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GRE AWA Practice - GRE ARGUMENT ESSAY 7

GRE Analytical Writing Argument Essay Topic - 7

Typically, as people age, their bone mass decreases, making them more vulnerable to bone fractures. A recent study concludes that the most effective way to reduce the risk of fractures in later life is to take twice the recommended dose of vitamin D and calcium daily. The three-year study followed a group of French women in their eighties who were nursing home residents. The women were given daily supplements of twice the recommended dose of vitamin D and calcium. In addition, the women participated in a light weightlifting program. After three years, these women showed a much lower rate of hip fractures than is average for their age.





GRE AWA Analytical Writing Argument Essay Sample Solution - 7

The basis of this argument is the fact that people lose their bone mass as they age and therefore, they are more prone to fractures. According to the conclusion of this argument, old people should take twice the recommended dose of vitamin D and calcium. However, there are many loopholes in this study. The evidence used by the author is very vague.

First of all, this study is only on a group of French women. This cannot be true for the people from all other continents or even countries. People from different places have different food habits and different life styles. Every place has different climate and geological conditions. People from plain areas and people from hilly areas cannot be placed in the same group. Similarly, persons with active lifestyles cannot be merged with the not so active people. Even, males and females should be studied separately as they are very different from each other in terms of their physique and hormones. Their level of absorbing vitamin and calcium is different. There is also a possibility that the French people have something in their diet that prevents or reduces fractures. Moreover, the author has not mentioned the number of women in the group. If the group is too small, then it does not even represent all the French women. The author has assumed so many things and generalized the data, which cannot be possible.

Secondly, this study is done on nursing home residents, which in itself questions the study. There might be a possibility that these women had led an active life in their career and taken various precautions related to their health, hence they are less susceptible to fractures. It is highly possible that the other women, who are not the residents of a nursing home will suffer the same number of fractures in spite of taking the recommended vitamin D and calcium.

The third point is that this study is done only on the women who are in their eighties. Hence, the results of this study do not hold true for all age groups. Moreover, the author has also mentioned in his study that these women also participated in some lightweight exercises. The author has not taken care of this aspect while concluding the argument. It is highly possible that these lightweight exercises had actually strengthened the muscles of these women. The author has not mentioned or explained the relation between vitamin D and calcium and the strength of bones. He should have explained in details the relation between the fractures and the intake of vitamin D and calcium.

The lowest point of this argument is that according to the author, the women have shown a lower rate of hip fractures. He has not even mentioned the effect of increased dose of vitamin on the other types of fractures. Hence, the results cannot be true for other types of fractures. The author should have also considered other fractures. Hence, it can be concluded that this study is incomplete and deprived of enough evidence. Hence, this conclusion is not very convincing.

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